Wednesday, April 29, 2009

I Guess It's Not For Me

I'm tired..
I'm exhausted..
I'm confused..
I'm mad..
I'm sad..
I feel so alone..

Finally, it's near to the end..
It's not a finish line, but more like a dead end road..
It's not the first time that we've made such a decision..
But now it feels like it's the real end..

There's no turning back..
There's no going to our home..
We've made another separate ways..
But it feels like a real goodbye..

I can't understand what's on your mind..
And i guess you can't stand me anymore..
There's no different, everything quite the same..
Just like when we decided to start our story..
But it has to be over right now..

We've made our promise..
But none of us can keep it..
We tried our best, but it couldn't change anything..
Everything so blurry, none was real..

She already put me in her past..
Everything will never be the same for her..
I tried to break her shield..
And all that i've got just goodbye..

I'm full of doubt right now..
If she can't stand me now, then there's no reason to be with her in the future..
She convinced me that i will always be the important part of her life..
But if she can't accept me now, then i guess it means nothing..

All your sweet words, all of the happiness we found together..
All those years we spent together, all of the smile and tears we shared..
They means nothing at all..
Because in the end, she already gave me up from her life..
(Even she still asked me to be her friend at last)

But that's only a past..
I'm 23 now, i'm still got a lot of good things to come..
I have to put her in my past..
I have to erase her from my memory..
She will always be the sweetest..
But she's not for me..
And i should never look back again..

It's time to put a smile back on my face..
It's time to put a confidence back in me..
It's time to reach my dreams..
It's time to motivate myself..
It's time to move on..

I have to prepare myself..
This is not the end, it just a part of my life..
There is no pain and regret..
There's only a beautiful memory to be keep and a beautiful mistake to be learn..

I never said that i hate you..
It's just a decision to be made..
For you and for me..
I hope God will always give you all the happiness in the world..
I hope you will find your love..

But you're not for me..
You're not the one that will wait for me..
I guess it's time for you to take the next step of your life..
But it's not with me..

And i guess it's not for me..

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